Not Just Another Pretty Face in the Stands

Let’s be honest: one of the best things about traveling out of town to tournaments and coaching school is shopping. Last weekend, my daughter and I were particularly excited to visit a store that sold purses I have been coveting for many months. They are way out of our budget, but I was determined to lay eyes on the bags I had studied in magazines and on-line the past year. Years ago, I would have avoided the store — I would have been too self-conscious to visit an establishment dressed in clothes more suitable for a weekend at the gym. But age does something to us: I walked in, explained to the sales associate my fascination with the bags and browsed the store, oohing and aahing along the way. She was at my shoulder the entire time and I saw her give another sales associate a look that I could not or cared to analyze, but I did not let that deter me from enjoying the exquisite collection. I had come too far. As coaches wives, we often let others affect how we enjoy the season. The beauty of watching your husband’s craft should give you joy. Don’t let others affect your view.

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I looked out the front window this evening right before closing the shades when I saw a dangling spider working furiously off the edge of our porch. I stepped outside to get a closer look and saw her bulging belly - how tired she must be carrying such a heavy load. But not once did she stop and complain. She just went up and down, back and forth in a smooth rhythm - with no encouragement, no assistance. It was just her against the world. I smiled at her and went inside and looked around at my four children. I am not facing a time crunch like the mama spider but I must not waste a moment preparing them for the world. I, too, was made for this job, and must not waste a minute.

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I met the most amazing man the other day at . As Gilbert Tuhabonye disappeared time and time again to retrieve running shoes for my four children (they long ago stopped picking out shoes to try on but now know that the running experts there will choose the shoes for them), we made small talk. As each child laced up pair after pair of Brooks, Asics, Saucony’s, Adidas, Fila’s, our conversation interrupted repeatedly to check for fit as he patiently bent down and felt their big toes and asked them to jog the length of the store so he could observe their stride. In the midst of the afternoon, Gilbert eventually shared that he had written a book, but when I asked what it was about, he brushed the burn marks on his arms and placed his fingers to his lips and said, “we will talk later.” We never returned to the topic again and he disappeared from the cash register before we could visit further. That evening at the hotel, I pulled out the complimentary hotel book listing local attractions in Austin trying to find something to do for four children ranging in ages from 10 to 17 years, when I found Gilbert’s face staring back at me. I couldn’t read the page fast enough. The quiet, unassuming man who so patiently helped us that afternoon, more than 10 years earlier had been buried under a pile of burning bodies for more than eight hours after the Hutus attacked his school and killed all the Tutsi children and teachers in the centuries-old battle between the two tribes. Gilbert was the only survivor who crawled out of that building using a femur bone to smash a window and begin his long run to freedom and life in the United States. I found the book the next morning at and have slowly and meticulously read every word. His story and his willingness to share such painful memories has already made a profound impact on my life. This book - “This Voice in My Heart - A Runner’s Memoir of Genocide, Faith, and Forgiveness” needs to be read, not just by runners, but to help us to learn how to survive and to forgive. I am forever moved and so grateful that Gilbert chose us that late afternoon in RunTex. I know God put Gilbert in my path that day, and I am forever grateful. The book is published by and is available for 13.95 in paperback and $23.95 in hard cover.

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Cutting our trip to Austin short today. On our agenda for Thursday was a return visit to the Lady Bird Johnson Wildflower Center and our first trip to the Lyndon B. Johnson Presidential Library and Museum but when we heard late yesterday of Mrs. Johnson’s death, we decided to return home ahead of schedule. I admire very few women who live their lives in the public eye, but Mrs. Johnson was the exception. She used her position to beautify Texas and quietly place gladness in our hearts. Each time I pass a roadside spot dotted with Texas Bluebonnets or Indian Paintbrushes, I silently thank her for bringing such beauty into my life. My mother and I have taught my children the value of using native plants in our landscaping and the importance of beautifying a home with color. Mrs. Johnson helped extend the lesson that our home, our life extends past our yard into our neighbor’s yard and into the road beyond. Her impact is seen every day in many ways people may not immediately draw back to her. We should all learn a lesson from a quote she has placed on the wildflower center’s website:

“We are obligated to leave the country looking as good if not better than we found it.”

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Writing this morning from Austin, the site of this year’s coaching school. Sometimes, coaching school is the only way coaching families are able to squeeze in any vacation time. I am stalling before I lace up my running shoes and take off for a quick run around the hotel. I am super-psyched today because I am planning on visiting one of my two fave running stores  . If you’ve never been, you need to visit the next time you are in the state Capital. I only trust the sales help there to fit my four children. We shop twice a year to purchase running shoes and this time I will buy a new pair of Adidas Super Nova Classic’s. We are supposed to switch out running shoes every 300 miles, and I am past due. And I am so excited because I just found out that Adidas has updated the color to orange from its traditional blue, which I have been wearing for the past 10 years.

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I iron everything. And, when I say everything, I mean everything: t-shirts, shorts and even tissue paper. So, when my husband dropped the iron during a rare moment of pressing clothes when I was busy elsewhere, the search was on for the perfect iron. Years ago, my mother introduced me to Rowenta and I have never looked back. While others ask for jewels for their birthday, I beg for household items. This year, my mother found an even better iron than my last one: the Rowenta Advancer. The iron feels light, unlike my last one and glides over the fabric. I am pleased with the amount of steam generated with the iron because I press a great deal of cotton. Available from Linens ‘n Things for $129.99. Worth every penny.

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In an effort to reclaim my two oldest son’s from my husband this summer, I joined them on the golf course - a sport in which they have become obsessed with the past year. If they are not golfing, they are reading Golf Digest or books from the experts (Hogan, Penick) or watching The Golf Channel or researching swings on YouTube. My husband secured us the first tee time on July 4 (the pro shop is on speed dial) and as I lined up for my first drive I was pleased we would not have to wait on anyone. But as I ventured down the fairway, my enthusiasm waned as the swarms of mosquitoes hungry from a night of human host inactivity attacked. When I reached a par 3 and pulled it into the rough along a soupy area waterlogged from two months of rains in Texas, I looked down as I set up my pitching wedge, and I kid you not, there were no less than 75 mosquitoes. It was extremely unnerving and from that point on, I could care less about my score. I was only interested in survival. Fortunately, my son had listened to me and was carrying around the bottle of Coppertone Bug & Sun in their bag I had purchased for them months ago. Without it, the 25 or so bites I now harbor would have been much worse. Oh, they still swarmed but they did not bite. And I like the fact that it is a 2-for-1 product. Anything that saves time, is tops on my list. With DEET at only 10 percent, it won’t be the best protectant (I prefer 28 percent) but smells much better. Available at local drugstores and for about $10.

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Each fall, I gather seeds from my mother’s fantastic flower bed in the Dallas-area, but I often forget what I planted so I tend to take a wait-and-see attitude before weeding my garden. But as the latest blooms proliferated in four flower beds, I realized many of the lush plants were not flowers, but weeds. As I yanked them up and threw them aside, I thought, “How often do we give people a ‘grace period’ before pulling them up and ridding them from our lives? How much do they need to invade our lives before we cut them loose? How much water and fertilizer do we use on them before cutting them out of our lives before they choke out the good flowers or stunt our growth? Do we have a ‘wait-and-see’ attitude with people, just like we have with weeds?”I think we need to give each plant or each person a chance, but when they begin to harm and choke out your own  growth, you need to step back, re-evaluate and spend time on the important things in your life; your family, your faith and yourself.

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